You’re in your twenties now and that’s crazy to think about. You still have your bad habits and you still have a huge list of projects to finish pinned on your planner. I don’t know what to tell you; I want to say I am disappointed but that would be an over statement. There is really no word I can think of that is between “I am so proud of you right now” and “You can do better,” but just know you’re right in the middle. Maybe that’s harsh, but I have a reason for it.
I love who you are, what you stand for, and the person you have become over these past 2 years. The problem I see is that you have too much you want to do and you want to do it all right now: So you do everything all at once. You aren’t giving yourself elbow room, so you never finish your projects. You don’t fully dedicate yourself to one specific idea and so it doesn’t grow, it doesn’t get the nutrients it needs. It’s like trying to fit 50 different plants in the window seal above your kitchen sink; they won’t fit. It’s going to be too crowded for the sun to hit all of the plants and a lot of them are going to die. It has nothing to do with your capabilities because I know you are capable of watering them (until you get exhausted and miss a few), but without the sunlight they are all going to die.
A project that should take 2 weeks is now going on 4 months. A big announcement you want to share has been in the air for 6 months. I’m proud of your enthusiasm but I fear you won’t make it because of your in-patience. So that’s why I am writing this, to remind you of who you are and that you can make it.
I challenge you to finish what you set in front of yourself by the end of this year. Set yourself deadlines, Shelf new ideas for a later time (it will happen, don’t fear it won’t. Just keep it on the shelf, don’t throw it away) and have self control. Everything takes time. You even said yourself that time is just a number to give us closure on the ever changing environment, so don’t be afraid of time, it doesn’t bite. It’s going to take a few months to start new habits and loose the old, maybe even sooner if you push yourself hard enough. Give yourself room to accomplish things, build more shelves if that’s what it takes to store all the creativity you have. Emily, you were made to have an unending amount of skills, talents, and ideas, don’t sell yourself short.
One last thing I want to remind you: You have a gift of celebration and it’s the most beautiful thing. You get excited about the small stuff and that’s what keeps you going. You make yourself laugh, which makes others laugh, which brings an environment of fun. You are so vulnerable at times it scares me. You put yourself out there in ways others can’t because of fear, but you push past the fear and the thought of rejection, because that’s who you are; you are someone that can look past the flaws of this world and see the beauty in everything. You have your moments, yes, but everyone does. Your brain works in organization and that’s why you can do so much, think so much, and dream so much. Keeping going Em, you are a Funk house and everyone wants to join the party.
With so much love, Em